Dear Mom: Women's Letters of Love, Loss, and Longing

Reading this wonderful collection of letters was like being in a room with a group of wise, thoughtful women, all sharing their stories about their mothers. Whether the letters described love, loss, or longing, they revealed the rich complication at the heart of most mother-daughter relationships. I enjoyed lingering over the letters and insightful profiles--one or two at a time--and ended up feeling less alone in my feelings about my mother. I'm going to send a copy to my sister.

As a man, I've always had a hard time "getting" the relationship between women and their mothers. My wife read this book and recommended it to me. It really opened up a "terra incognita". First of all, instead of the usual boring academic analysis on this kind of topic you get first hand accounts from women from all kinds of angles. Some express gratitude, some are filled with regret over missed opportunities to repair a broken relationship, and some mourn the loss and celebrate the memories of a dead parent. Considering that the contributors are not professional writers, it is somewhat amazing that this book is so well written-- by any standard,professional or otherwise. The stories dig deep and are quite personal compared to the usual chatter you hear when people talk about their parents. If you have an interest in this subject, DEAR MOM will definitely enlighten you.

No matter how old you are, you are always somebody's daughter. Some of these letters were written by women in their 90s. It is interesting to see how certain conflicts changed through the generations--and some remained exactly the same. Well worth a read. I learned to appreciate my own mother by reading this book.

Once you pick this book up it's hard to put down. I found myself identifying with parts from so many of the women's letters. The profiles that precede each letter put the women's comments into a provocative context. I knew Dear Mom would be good, because Deborah Berger is a good writer and meticulous editor- but I wasn't ready for it to be this good!

This book is a wonderful exploration of the mother/daughter relationship--good, bad and indifferent. It helped me focus on what I have not said to my mother and to know that I am not unique in the conflicted butloving relationship I have with her. A great gift for Mothers' Day!