Coping with Your Partner's Jealousy

I am surprised to see only one review posted for this book. Then again, I'm surprised that I even read the book! This book is one of the many that sit on the shelves of the small library of books and videos that my wife keeps available for her patients. Neither I nor my wife are even remotely jealous. However, this book jumped out at me one day, so I read it. And I'm glad I did. Following are the Chapter's titles: 1. Your Jealous Partner and You 2. Triggers of Jealousy (Immediate Factors) and Why They Don't Matter 3. Why Your Partner Turns Green: Some Self Factors 4. Past Experiences 5. Family of Origin Experiences 6. The Jealous Partner: Clingy and Reactive Styles 7. The Jealous Partner: Manipulative and Exhibitionistic Styles 8. Suggested Coping Strategies If you don't know this before you read the book, you surely will know it once you're finished reading the book: Jealousy is, perhaps, the "king" of irrational expressions. Jealousy, like other emotions and expressions, is essentially based on nothing pertinent to "now," or "the moment." The author nicely covers what could be causative factors, the "past experiences" and "family of origin experiences," but even if YOU are in "the now," the jealous person likely won't be. In and of itself, jealousy is harmless; it can sit in the mind of the insecure and fearful for years and years. However, once expressed, that unreasoning nothingness can become destructive, not just emotionally but physically. And for the really twisted, the irrationality of jealousy blended with a sprig of cunning can be wielded as an insidiously powerful tool for controlling others. What I liked about Ms. Brown's message was that she alerts us to not only the irrationality of jealousy but the measures that can be taken to prevent being caught up in the ridiculous and unproductive confrontations that commonly occur between one jealous person and that person's spouse or partner. She lists actions that should be considered when the jealous person may be headed toward throwing or does indeed throw a fit, actions (some, actually reactions) which she refers to as "internal and external." The Internal: (1) Remember that you are not a parent; (2) Avoid retaliation; (3) Leave others out; (4) Accept your partner's switches; and (5) Stay in touch with your thoughts and feelings. The External: (1) Soften your voice tone; (2) Reaffirm the relationship; (3) Maintain eye contact; (4) Try to relax; and (5) Avoid becoming defensive. And though this book was not required reading for me, I do not take it lightly. After having grown up in a fairly rough neighborhood, and having played in a club band for over five years, I can tell you that the jealousy affliction is not uncommon. I have seen more than one jealous individual physically strike a respective undeserving victim. Whether it be in public or in the privacy of your home, this abuse must not be tolerated. I recommend this book for those who have concerns about their spouses or m