Confusing Love with Obsession: When You Can't Stop Controlling Your Partner and the Relationship

I read Moore's book and was very impressed with each of the case studies. In some way, each person's story spoke to my own situation in a controlling relationship. There were many times that I had to put the book aside because it hurt too much to keep reading. As I kept turning the pages, I saw all of the patterns in my own life and then the lightbulb went off and I thought, "That's me!" If you are in a controlling relationship or are obsessed with someone else, you have to get this book. It will change your life forever.

I found out about this book while traveling through Northern Ireland on a soul searching tour of sorts. I had recently divorced and was trying to figure out where I was heading in my life. That is when I came accross the book at a local market. Talk about an eye opener! Moore reached into the depths of my very being and spoke to my heart. All of my life, I felt like love was supposed to hurt and feel crappy. Now I know that it does not have to be this way and that loving another person starts with me! He does not use religion or anything, just plain honesty about stuff we all go through that makes us into the people we are today. When you grow up in an unhealthy environment, it has a way of effecting your relationships later in life. Get this book if you are dealing with an obsessive relationship or if you know someone who is. It's life changing.

We were assigned this book to read by our instructor at the university I attend for undergraduate social work. Confusing Love with obsession advances so many psychological concepts ways that are easilly understood by the reader. I think what I found most alluring about this book was the level of compassion offered by the author. He went out of his way to not cast blame on relationally depedent people and offered concrete reasons as to why someone might behave destructively in personal relationships. There were a few times I had to put the book down because it started to influence me emotionally. If you are looking for insightful reading material that will hold your attention, get a copy of this book.

I was assigned to read this book by a psychologist after I was involved in an incident, since I am in the military. Like any other assigned reading, I was very reluctant, until I began reading this book . . . and all I could think was, "How could he know?"; Every relationship case study I followed had the same patterns he was describing, and I couldn't read more than a few chapters at a time without having to put the book down so I could stop crying. It all made so much sense! Never before had my behavior been described to me in such a way to make me realize: There was a reason why I fell for the wrong men and gave so much to a disasterous relationship. I was always a fool in love, and in love with a fool. Now I am in love with a beautiful man who actually puts my needs before his own. Now I cry because he makes me so happy instead of crying because he broke my heart again! If you can relate at all, you must read this book and see for yourself . . .

I purchased and read this book a week ago after a painful divorce was finalized. Fast forward to now and here I am in the same situation yet again, falling in love with a different man. I read the book and did not take much to heart, basically because I was in denial. But after picking up the book again and giving serious thought to what Moore presented, I can see how addicted I am to relationships. I also found myself feeling a bit embarrassed as I read this book, because much of what was presented hit a little too closee to home. Looking back on my marriage, I behaved just like some of the people in the case studies did - using food to manipulate my ex-husband into gaining weight. I also broke into his computer and deleted emails and tried to cause trouble for him. Why? Because I was obsessed with my ex husband and addicted to our marriage. I have now been motivated to join a support group and get help from a therapist. As for my new relationship, I am putting that on ice until I begin to heal. If you decide to buy this book, be prepared for some moments where you might cry. This is perhaps one of the best books I have ever read, because Moore writes with compassion and shows how relational dependency effects both WOMEN AND MEN!It will change your life!