Comeback Season: How I Learned to Play the Game of Love

This is a wonderful book that's fully of humor and humanity. It's a title I've recommended to my friends and family as a (true!) story that hits close to home for any intellegent person looking for their soul mate. The book has resulted in a lot discussions about relationships and the many dating moments that we've all experienced trying to find the right one. Cathy - don't give up!

"Comeback Season" made me vaguely uncomfortable at first, for which I blame this simple fact: I'm a man. I don't read books about dating, especially women dating, not even if they have a catchy football angle. And to be utterly truthful, the last time I did any reading about football, I was thumbing idly through a year-old Sports Illustrated while waiting to get a cavity filled. So one would not think that I would even countenance reading a book such as this. However, after hearing a radio interview with the author, I was moved to check it out, in part because I, like Ms. Day at the beginning of her book, am 37, educated, and single, and I would be hard pressed to think of a single acquaintance of my own age who is stil, well, single. Like Ms. Day, I have spent an inordinate amount of time wondering what's wrong with me, not out of unhealthy self-absorbtion, but genuine concern. The difference between me and the author is that she decided to take action to change her life. And then she wrote this book. I assume you've read the synopsis already, so I won't dwell on the plotline, other than to say it is by turns funny and profoundly thought-provoking, a performance-art journal and a diary of 3 a.m. despair. It showed me a situation quite similar to my own, but from the perspective of a member of the opposite sex. And, no, guys, you'll find no feminist rants here, no man-hating or man-baiting. The most refreshing thing about the book, considering its subject matter, is its almost total lack of ideological or gender-based rancor and its refusal to indulge in victimology. Like her earlier novel, this memoir is peopled by fully-realized human beings, both women and men, who are by turns weak and courageous, despicable and generous; no heroes or heroines, nor blameless victims, nor mustache-twirling villains. Nor are there quick and easy self-help solutions: Cathy does not get a makeover, a new wardrobe, and a frontal lobotomy and immediately find the love of her life; nor does she halfheartedly embrace a bitter compromise. Instead, she finds her own core and an unknown strength of character with the help of her loving family and friends and the virtues she's learned from her sports heroes. She comes to terms with the past decisions she's made, and finds grace and meaning in her present life, without earth-shattering calamity, divine revelation, or Oprah. Rather, she finds that the simple, sometimes hackneyed, often maligned influences in our lives - football, family, friends, silly 70's rock songs - can lead us to our better, greater selves.

Cathy Day's Comeback Season: How I Learned to Play the Game of Love concerns a topic near and dear to my heart: dating. The book take place during the year that culminated in the Colts going to the Superbowl. If I'm spoiling this for you by revealing that they win at the end of the book, congratulations. You're even more clueless about football than I am. Day, however, is not clueless about football. She loves the game the way I loved basketball more than a decade ago. She sees the characters, the narrative, the tragic moments and the euphoric triumphs in sports, and she writes about it so beautifully that even my eyes don't glaze over during the football passages. But the Colts are not the real story, here. At age 37, Day is tired of being single and she's going to let the Colts inspire her in her hunt for love. To aid her in game, she uses some funny conceits. She transcribes, word-for-word, the best of the halftime locker room pep talks from the sports movies she loves. And she imagines some very funny interviews between herself and a sports interviewer about how her season of finding someone to love is going. Breaking up the story with descriptions of games, the movie excerpts, and these interviews isn't just entertaining, it's necessary. Her account is personal, it's honest, she's earnest and vulnerable in this quest for love. For those of us who identify with her story, it's necessary to give us some relief. I can't figure out what seemed whiny to the editorial reviewer above. Day is honest about how important finding a relationship has become to her, and mystified by how hard it is to find one. Her tone is unsparing but not self-pitying. I'm not going to tell you how the book ends. If you're curious, read it. It's well worth it.

Comeback Season is NOT just another memoir about dating in the modern world. Cathy Day is a far cry from the stereotypical single woman from television and movies. She prefers beer over cosmopolitans, doesn't have a closet full of designer shoes, and isn't obsessed with her weight. In a society that tells singles that they have to change themselves in order to find love, Day chooses a refreshing alternative: Accept who you are, and get yourself out on the playing field. In Comeback Season, Day authentically chronicles the shady ways of serial daters, and the mystery of the guy who wants to be with you for a few months and then just suddenly doesn't. She blows the cover on certain dating services and websites that prey on people made vulnerable by their loneliness. Perhaps the most insightful is her attack on the notion that people are single either because they choose to be, or because they have some deep-seated personality flaw. Day argues that our world has grown increasingly isolating, and encourages us to stop blaming the individual and examine the social causes behind the rapid growth of the single population. Day strikes the perfect combination of dry wit and vulnerability that adds humor, warmth, and complexity to a subject that is often relegated to the self-help section of literature. This is not a self-help book. It is fantastic writing and a surprisingly compelling story that is difficult to put down once you start. And yes, you can know absolutely nothing about football and still enjoy every reference to the NFL.

I loved this book. It tells one woman's story of what it's like to be successful but single -- or possibly single because you've been so busy being successful. But it also tells the story of coming back from failure, whether that failure is losing in the NFL playoffs or being passed over, yet again, by someone you cared for and who you thought cared for you. Granted, I may be a bit biased in this assessment, being a somewhat successful and chronically single woman who also happens to adore NFL football. My first thought on hearing about this book was, "I should have written that." After only a dozen or so pages, I was enjoying the book so much I was glad I hadn't had to write it. Then as I read further, and I saw where the story was going, how smoothly the storylines were woven together, how real the people were, how perfectly it all worked. I started to feel a little envious again, this time because I knew I couldn't have written this book -- not as well as it's written. "Comeback Season" starts out as a clever premise but grows into a thoughtful treatise on the intersection of romance, success, confidence, and identity.