Choosing to Cheat: Who Wins When Family and Work Collide?

Andy Stanley writes, "Following the principles of God results in the blessings of God." The author's dad, Charles Stanley, says, "God doesn't reveal His will for our consideration. He reveals it for our participation." This may be your most important book purchase of the year--for yourself or your team members. Do you pledge allegiance to your boss? Andy Stanley says that "your Creator does not define your life by your career achievements or the neatness of your pantry." Writing to both stay-at-home parents and spouses in the workplace, Stanley says you must cheat on your work if you're going to win at home. (Read the book for his definition on "cheating.") He once admonished a struggling fast track executive, "the problem is, you love your family in your heart, but you don't love them in your schedule. And they can't see your heart." When you read this book, you'll never, ever think of Daniel without recalling Stanley's commentary. "Daniel's choice of diet was an indication of where he placed his loyalty. For us, the chief indicator is time. Daniel's loyalty was tested by what he ate. Ours is tested by what we put on our calendars. Where you spend your time is an indication of where your loyalties lie. In effect, you pledge your allegiance to the person or thing that receives your time." There are lots of books on balancing work and family. This one is different. It's not a guilt trip. Instead, it's a simple, thoughtful, Christ-centered process to help couples dig deep and ask themselves two or three really tough questions. Stanley adds, "No where in Scripture are you commanded to lay down your life for your stock options. Or to love your career like Christ loved the church. We are instructed to do our jobs and love our families (see Colossians 3:23). When you love your job and do your family, you've not only stepped outside the bounds of family life, you have stepped outside the will of God."

I read this book as part of an Introduction to Christian Ministries class. I found it to be a quick read but a profound one. As part of my assignment, I had to choose quotes that were meaningful to me. I highlighted over thirty! As a direct result of the impact the principles in this book had in my life, I made a commitment to be more available to my wife and growing family. This is a must-have title for anyone looking for good resources on practical, godly living. I share ideas from it with many of my friends and I must say that the choice of title is a nice touch, as it has prompted several discussions because it has a certain amount of "shock value".

This book is spot on, and provides a challenge for anyone who tries to balance all life throws at them with their responsibilities to God and family. It has great practical examples, an engaging writing style, and due to its relative short length, a quick read for even the slowest reader. BUYER BEWARE: This book will challenge you to rethink everything you have ever thought about time management, prioritization, career development, and goal setting. If you aren't ready to be challenged you may not be ready to get the most out of this book.

This is a good as well as a challenging read. The choice before those of us trying to "prioritize our time" is made clearly and succinctly. We can follow a lot of pathways in our rationale, but they still lead to the same crossroad. There is no "non-choice" option. One will come away from the book having made their decision. Stanley provides the information necessary to make sure that decision is the right one. This book has turned around the heads and the lives of many and will continue to do so. It demands a response.

I first heard Andy teach on this subject over a year ago. It's a life-changing and necessary book, and I don't know any family that couldn't benefit from its message."Choosing to Cheat" is built on the premise that everyone cheats somewhere - there aren't enough hours for everything. Tragically, it's easier to cheat our families than than to cheat at work. Andy not only tells us why we should cheat at work; he also tells us how. Ironically, cheating at work can make us more productive.I needed to read this message again, because it's always easy to return to old habits. Highly recommended.