Boots on the Ground by Dusk: My Tribute to Pat Tillman

Mary Tillman has skillfully written a complex account of military and political blunder and deceit into which she expertly intermingles her own story and that of her family. The resulting narrative is personal, political and readable - all at the same time. Since the beginning of the war in Afghanistan over 500 American soldiers have died. Since George W. Bush invaded Iraq, in March of 2003, over 4100 have been killed and almost 4000 of those have died since the president's infamous declaration of "Mission Accomplished." Tillman's "Boots on the Ground By Dusk" is the beautifully written, but gut-wrenching story of one of those soldiers. By this time, I suppose, there can be few Americans who do not understand the general outline of the Bush Administration's complex push for war in Iraq. That campaign, as it has been uncovered elsewhere, involved the deliberate use of distortion and misinformation ranging from unambiguous lies suggesting a link between Saddam Hussein and al Qaeda, to tales of the non-existent WMDs, to neocon assertions of an American democratizing mission in the middle east. The larger-scale story of the Iraq war involves, among other things, the international repercussions of President Bush's attempt to assert American global hegemony in the 21st century. In stark contrast, this very personal book, written by the mother of pro-footballer-turned-soldier, Pat Tillman, is connected to that war at only the most basic level; that of the individual soldier. Nevertheless, as the book unfolds, it reveals a web of deception that matches the distortions at the international level. It is as if everyone connected to this administration's war effort is simply unable to tell the truth. It is as if dishonesty and manipulation have become part of their DNA. The book begins with Mrs. Tillman's account of staring into a fire pit. She is sitting in front of her home, the home in which she raised her children, smoking, listening to the crackling logs, and thinking, "I light my cigarette wondering what I would do if I couldn't smoke, if I couldn't blow out my anger, frustration, and sense of crippling loss into the night." It is a stunning description of the isolation and helplessness that accompanies unbearable loss, but the book that follows is, in one sense, an answer to her question. When blowing out anger and loss "into the night" was no longer enough she would ask questions, investigate contradictions, and write. In the earliest pages the reader is introduced to the extended Tillman family and how they become the people they are. They share ideas and debate issues. The attacks of 9/11 hit them hard and, in response, the two oldest sons, Pat and Kevin, decide to join the Army. It is not a popular decision. The youngest brother, Richard, reacts with anger, others are worried, and still others confused. Kevin is just about to leave a life in minor league baseball, but Pat will have to give up a promising career in pro football with the Ar

Many of the facts of Corporal Pat Tillman's life and tragic death have been played and replayed: his joining the military from a deep love of his country after the attacks of September 11, 2001, his giving up a career as a professional football player and leaving his young bride to do so, his platoon's ill-fated mission in Afghanistan that led to his death on April 22, 2004, his memorial service where the likes of Maria Shriver and Senator John McCain gave eulogies, his receiving both the Purple Heart and Silver Star for bravery, then the news soon thereafter that he had died of (such an ugly oxymoron) friendly fire. Now Tillman's mother Mary covers both the life and death of her son, the effect it has had on her, his wife Marie, his brothers Richard and Kevin-- who was in the same platoon as Pat-- his father Patrick, other family members and a multitude of friends. Additionally with the determination and courage of a woman possessed-- why shouldn't she be-- she traces the family's quest to find out the truth of what really happened on that awful day in April, 2004. Her journey will take her to countless meetings with military types, where she has difficulty getting a similar story from different people, and ultimately to two Congressional hearings. What Ms. Tillman learns is sad and depressing beyond measure as she and others excavate the layers of a cover-up. Apparently Corporal Tillman was given CPR hours after he died so that his uniform could be destroyed since the bullet holes in it would indicate clearly that he died from U. S. fire. (If a soldier is still alive, his uniform, because it is a biohazard, can be taken off him and destroyed.) A Navy Seal was told to give false information about Tillman's death when he spoke at his memorial service. Records were changed; documents were lost. The list goes on and on. Then there are cruel, petty gestures on the part of some of the military. One of the officers placed in charge of one of the many investigations, for example, believed that no one in the Tillman family was satisfied or would ever be satisfied because they were atheists, unlike Christians, who could come to terms with "'faith and the fact that there is an afterlife, heaven, or whatnot.'" The Army reneged on its promise to fly Tillman's wife Marie to Dover, Delaware to meet Kevin Tillman with her husband's body. (An anonymous man had her flown there in his plane.) Then the Army tried to persuade Marie to have a military funeral for Pat. Ms. Tillman includes many of the eulogies verbatim from her son's funeral--his baby brother Richard's was irreverent and deadly-- as well as written reports that she has received from the Army in her attempt at finding out the truth about Pat's death. She also prints here an article Kevin Tillman wrote for Truthdig entitled "After Pat's Birthday" that rises to the level of poetry: "Somehow those afraid to fight in an illegal invasion decades ago are allowed to send soldiers to die for an illegal in

I certainly feel for the Tillman family. Forty years ago my father, the only Olympic medal winner ever killed while serving in combat for the USA, was killed in Vietnam. My father was on a six man recon. team in a Ranger detachment and according to the statement by the commander of his ready reaction force, although his team was out of radio contact for nearly 11 hours, he was unconcerned because he had another force near the location that had heard nothing. Well, I have three other reports conflicting that statement. My father's team radioed at 915PM that his team was being approached by an enemy force. At 935PM his team radioed they were in a firefight and requested fire support. Not until well after 6AM the next morning did help arrive even though the ready reaction force was on ten minute alert and only 500 meters away with the fire power equivalent of three rifle companys. 5 of the 6 men on my fathers team were killed, one dying on the way to the hospital. I have the records proving that at 9AM that morning this CO met with a general and my father's commanding officer and four decades later have evidence that the most likely "enemy" that killed my father was the US Navy SEALs. But I can get no answers after all these years. And that is why it is so biter sweet, this book and the circumstances surrounding Tillman's death. When I read in the newspaper that the Army assigns all these folks to research and serve the Tillman's, all these investigations by generals and boards it gives me a really sick feeling in side. Yes, the Tillman's deserve it, but what about the rest of us ? I wrote to the National Archives for my father's records and they responded telling me that they could not locate his records but let me know that they could happily tell me he served in the Army (duh). The Army told me that they are not historians. I was able to contact the commander of the L ready reaction force and he told me he could not help me because his tour ended before the investigation was completed. The intelligence officer my father's unit worked for said he was on R & R at the time, an imposter told me he was the only survivor and the stories go on and on... Will the Tillman's ever get the truth ? Probably not because in the military only good news goes to the top. No officer is going to burn his chance at a promotion by being honest in a report that will screw him 20 years down the road. I am glad to see this book. My heart goes out to the Tillman's because I understand their resentment. If you want to read about my father, SSGT Robert Carmody- go to ESPN and look in archives and search under the author "Mark Chalifoux'. The article is titled, "Heart of Bronze". (2005).

The most unique aspect of this book is hearing the family and friend's perspective on many events before and after Pat's death. I have followed the news stories for the last four years and watched the video on espn of the memorial service. This book differs from the past material in that there are new stories and you get the family and friends perspectives on these and other major events already covered in past articles and books. The book also has Pat's memorial speakers' words. This book is similar in that aspect to Walter Payton's book, "Never Die Easy" and the speakers at his funeral. The difference being the obvious different circumstances of death, and you get the Mother's perspective on how she felt about those speeches and that some of the speakers were not telling the truth about the events that led to Pat's death, that is the military speakers.