Bonds of Iron: Forging Lasting Male Relationships

Within the realm of Family Values, children are taught to value not only family, but also friendships. As adults, however, there is great pressure to discount the value of friendships among males and females, between men, and between women - particularly where marriage values are strong. For many adults who live away from childhood friends, or who have no childhood friends, close emotional support expected to be found in friendships may not be present, or cultivated as the necessary social relations they are. Most are the result of work or sports groups with whom people spend time but may not contain the emotional depth of childhood friends. The quality of dual gender non-spousal friendships is always suspect, increasing the need for male friends, or female friends, which may not be readily available for the types of associations adults require, as the natural consequence of having had childhood friends. Patterns of friendships and their sources (as well as their depth) is one of the little studied human behavior, perhaps the world over. At times, even the quality of friendships is undefined and confusing often being the result of mutually beneficial social or economic relationships rather than the simple, mutual appreciation and admiration of that between childhood friends. Intergenerational friendships, if at all, are often those associated with grandparents or other family members rather than outsiders, and increasingly problematic in view of recent news articles where children are exploited through friendship. A review and evaluation of the integrity of relationships between friends is more likely the need which this analysis begins to address to understand the need for, and the quality of, real friendships and hopefully, how they are made, since, for men, quality friendships are increasingly rare commodities unless they are rooted in the trust of childhood friends, carried over to adulthood. A relatively new field of exploration, the dynamics of adult friendships is unexplored territory in human relations.