Bad Press: The Worst Critical Reviews Ever!

A fascinating little book of reviews that cut to the bone,unmercifully. 250 pages of sarcastic,scoffing,derisive,depreciating,sneering,lampooning, lashing,and downright mean reviews and remasrks made by all kinds of pople about movies,literature,TV,music food and theatre. There are no holds barred when these people let go with their opinions. My only regret is that I am not familiar with some of those making the comments or some of the things they are commenting on. It is also clear that when it comes to masterful put-downs;the more concise and to the point,the better. Not surprisingly; few are able to match Mark Twain or Oscar Wilde; at least in my humble opinion. I am sure everyone who picks up this book will find their own favorites. Here are a few of mine; "Reading him is like wading through glue." Alfred Lord Tennyson on Ben Jonson "Mr.Priestly has always been good at making a short story long. This is a short book. Elizabeth Bibesco on J.P.Priestly "Bernard Shaw is an excellent man; he has not an enemy in the world,and none of his friends like him." Oscar Wilde "I like a thin book because it will steady a table,a leather volume because it will strop a razor,and a heavy book because it can be thrown at a cat." Mark Twain "The reason why so few good books are written is that so few people who can write know anything." Walter Bagehot "People who like this sort of thing will find this the sort of thing they like." Abe Lincoln's review of a book And finally on music; "Like two skeletons copulating on a corrugated tin roof." Sir Thomas Beecham on the harpsichord.

"An experience so vacuous, it's almost frightening..." is from a review of 'Xanadu' by Ian Birch, and sums up much of the commentary in this amusing little book. The book is a collection of reviews covering several centuries, and featuring many notables (and others you have never heard of) such as George Bernard Shaw, Dorothy Parker, and the wonderfully biting Rick Kushman, who makes reading the 'Sacramento Bee' a singular pleasure. The book is presented in sections on theater, movies, literature, etc., and features some delicious examples of literary witticism. I have my favorites and they are far too numerous to mention, but what follows are just a few examples to illustrate my point."'The Birthday Party' is like a vintage Hitchcock thriller which has been, in the immortal tear-stained words of Orson Wells, 'edited by a cross-eyed studio janitor with a lawn mower.'" -Alan Brien"This is M. Ionesco's first attempt at a social play, and the number of interpretations to which it is susceptible is roughly equal to the number of people in the audience." - Kenneth Tynan on 'Rhinoceros' by Eugene Ionesco, 1960"They gave us for dinner boiled ant-bear and red monkey; two dishes unknown even at Beauvilliers or Paris.... The monkey was very good indeed, but the ant-bear had been kept beyond its time; it stank as our venison does in England..." -Charles Waterton"What can I do with it? It's like a lot of yaks jumping about." -Sir Thomas Beecham on the third movement of Beethoven's 'Seventh Symphony'"The music of Wagner imposes mental tortures that only algebra has the right to inflict." -Paul de Saint-Victor on Richard Wagner in 'La Presse'And finally, my all time favorite review in the entire book, and probably of all time:"I love Wagner; but the music I prefer is that of a cat hung up by its tail outside a window and trying to stick to the panes of glass with its claws." -Charles BaudelaireMy only criticism of the book is that its roughly square shape makes holding it a bit of a chore, as it is quite thick, yet dimuitive of height and width. It's good material, just a less than ideal format. If you want a book filled with some of the worlds all time pithiest reviews, this is the book for you.

This book is hilarious, full of enlightening and amusing nuggets. It's fun, but educational too. The breadth of research (the range of authors, the huge variety of newspapers, books and journals researched) is impressive. There's everything here - from critics of Shakespeare (did you know how much Samuel Pepys hated the bard?) to Mary McCarthy's well-reasoned but damning theatre reviews, to Mark Twain and Dorothy Parker respectively pulling their unsuspecting victims apart (from the latter, there's the pearl 'Theodor Dreiser ought to write nicer'). The restaurant stuff is laugh out loud - I LOVE the bits by Dara Moskowitz. It's also nice to see the 'greats' of yesteryear (eg Henry James, George Eliot, Flaubert) suffering at the hands of unimpressed - or lazy - critics. It certainly makes you think about the vagaries of fashion.

Quotes from the most devastating critical reviews ever, probes historical magazines to provide the nastiest - and funniest - reviews ever comprise the pagers of Bad Press. From Henry Van Dyke's quick assessment of jazz music ("Jazz: music invented for the torture of imbeciles") to Samuel Johnson's candid assessment of cucumbers ("A cucumber should be well sliced, and dressed with pepper and vinegar, and then thrown out, as good for nothing.")