Assisted Living for Our Parents: A Son's Journey

I am currently in the process of researching and selecting long-term living arrangements for my mother, who will be leaving her home of 43 years and moving across the country and has entrusted me to pick her new residence. I feel the weight of that responsibility and want to be sure that she is safe, happy, and well cared for, and able to remain independent as long and as well as her condition permits. Baum has provided great insight into questions we must ask and assurances we must get in writing. His documentation of the journey has helped me pay special attention as similar experiences arise. And further, Baum suggests that we take his experience and think about how we want our last years to be spent. Well written and not preachy, with a good checklist to apply before final decisions have been made. I am thankful to have found this book before completing our search, and have recommended it to others.

First off, this is the only book that I have seen about this topic that is not written by an insider with a vested interest in promoting assisted living facilities, care management, Alzheimer's facilities, or the like. Many books point you to resources that you could find in an hour or less on the Internet. This is so much more thoughtful. The author provides a self-reflective account of his own journey with his mother in trying to work out the best individualized arrangements for and with her. It is not one of these simplistic "my mother is your mother -and what you and your mother will face." An added plus is that he gives a lot of thoughtful attention to the promise and limitations of current options and newer models of aging.It is a very nice book that bridges the gap between public/social policies for the aging and personal experience. Books like this are unusual. I tend to shun books that tilt to either narcissistically, personal stories or heavily annotated accounts. Hopefully, this book will help mobilize readers to think that creative, humanistic solutions are possible.

Every older person, especially those living alone, and their family members should read this book. Anyone who is considering an assisted living situation for a parent will learn invaluable information.

This is a very good book for anyone who has to put their parent in an Assisted Living Facility, even if you live close to your parent. You can tell Dan always had his mother's over-all well-being at the center of his decisions. The future is so uncertain, this is a good book to read as Dan tells of his personal experience with their choice of ALF. Sharing Ida's experience has helped me when it came time to put my own Mother in an ALF in Dec 2006. My sister, Mom & I visited various ALF's, and Mom chose the one she liked best. My sister and I made sure it will give her the support she will need when her health will require more assistance. Mom has early-stages of Alzheimer's; physically she is fine, but mentally, she cannot remember current events. Dan covers every aspect of life in an ALF, his experience with the good parts and the bad. All of this knowledge is best found out before-hand, so you are more prepared for what can happen in the future. Due to his insight, I hope to be able to give Mom a comfortable and well-assisted life. Barbara