Are You Really Listening?: Keys to Successful Communication

I feel like I've been waiting forever to find a book that would neatly describe how to listen better. There are so many "self-help" books out there, but nearly all of them are ineffectual. Are You Really Listening, however, is extremely useful. I have found it so helpful in my life, because the authors wrote it using an honest and clear voice that is shared between them. Moreover, I found the brief case illustrations to illuminate wonderfully the messages and lessons that these two experts prescribe. Buy this book.

What a marvelous book! It so clearly makes the case that listening is the essential element in any good relationship. Friendships, businesses, and famiilies all benefit from genuine understanding. Are You Really Listening? not only demonstrates the value of listening, it teaches in a clear step-by-step manner how to listen. I loved it and I am giving it as gifts to friends and family.

I work across the U.S., consulting with mathematics teachers and school administrators on how to improve the teaching of mathematics through attending to how students learn mathematics. Listening to students and, equally important, teachers listening to each other are essential in this endeavor. This book fills a long-standing, critical need in my work, by delineating a framework, highlighting the obstacles to "really listening," and providing guidance on how to listen more effectively.

Paul Donoghue and Mary Siegel have written a masterful book which in a very concrete and understandable way educates the reader in the fine art of communication. As a priest, this book is an invaluable resource, as it helps me to be sure that I am communicating clearly and also listening to what is being said to me. By indentifying the many ways that we can slip into old communication patterns, without being aware of it, the authors ensure that anyone reading this book will come away with a new understanding of how to be heard and to listen. It is a gift to anyone for whom clear communications is important in a professional capacity, and perhaps even more, it is a huge help for all personal relationships as well. By simply reading this very clear and concise book, so much pain and misunderstanding could be avoided. We will be using this book in our parish study groups, and have recommended that all the leadership in our parish read it to help make their efforts more effective and meaningful. I recommend this book as a superb tool to everyone, but especially for anyone who has ever had the experience of not being fully heard or understood.

Enjoyably readable, both practical and profound, this book hits all the right notes. As a clinical psychologist I found it so helpful, both in anchoring my approach to clients and in my being able to recommend it to them to help improve, often to rescue, their most important relationships. In a compact presentation, with a wide array of engaging stories, the authors engender the necessary self-awareness of nonlistening behaviors, practiced with automatic ease even by those who see themselves as good listeners. This discussion lays the groundwork for the presentation of clear steps to skillful listening. In perhaps the greatest service, the authors suffuse this book with the essential spirit and meaning of listening--a vital human act of connecting with another person--for the sake of effectiveness, and for the sake of love.