Am I a Murderer?: Testament of a Jewish Ghetto Policeman

Before WWII, Perechodnik wasn't admitted to a Polish university, yet he concluded: "Besides, I want it clearly understood that I personally did not come in contact with anti-Semitism." (p. xxii). This adds to the refutation of the claim that prewar Polish anti-Semitism had been an inevitable and constant companion of Polish Jews, and that assimilated Polish Jews suffered from anti-Semitism as much as the unassimilated Jewish majority. The author provides eyewitness comments on the 1939 war, while in eastern Poland: "I don't deny that there were Jews--old-time Communists--who disarmed Polish detachments, but can one blame this on all the Jews? I believe that the number of Jews who fell with arms in hand while defending Poland was larger than the number of Jews disarming Polish detachments." (p. 2). [Probably true, but military service was compulsory and, in any case, loyalty is not a favor but a due.] Perechodnik believed that the 1939 war had brought Poles and Jews close together (p. 1), although this cooled somewhat in the following year or so (with Polish denunciations of Jews being "scattered incidents": p. 5). And, despite his later bitterness towards Poles, he recorded observations that don't support the modern notion of Poles habitually delighting in Jewish sufferings. Poles in trains passing the Ghetto lowered their heads, made the sign of the cross, and prayed: "May they rest in peace." (p. 41). On another occasion, Poles stood silently as they saw the blood marks on the pavement of murdered Jews. (p. 55). In a scene reminiscent of Lanzmann's SHOAH, Polish Jews gave a warning (not mockery) you-will-die gesture to Belgian Jews, who scoffed at it. (p. 107). And, unlike Jan T. Gross and his fans, who speak from their safe perches, Perechodnik didn't think that Poles had some kind of a general duty to risk their lives by hiding fugitive Jews. (p. 101). Perechodnik cuts the Polish Blue Police (Policja Granatowa) some slack in their thefts from Jews by recognizing the fact that the wages they were paid were non-livable. (p. 31). He doesn't go far enough. Poles themselves lived in crushing poverty under German occupation, and this fact readily explains their eagerness to acquire Jewish properties. In fact, Poles who stole from Jews said that: Jews were already doomed by the Germans, Jewish wealth had originated from Polish soil, and, were Poles not to take Jewish property, it would be taken anyway--by the Germans. (p. 6, 57, 72, 99). Of course, stealing is virtually universal in wartime, and even the Jewish ghetto policemen frequently stole from each other. (p. 88). The Ukrainian police was vicious. They often shot Jews in the Ghetto, at close range, for sport (pp. 33-35, 44, 105). As for Perechodnik's own Nazi collaboration, which included the dispatching of his relatives to their deaths at Treblinka, he wrote of having a stony heart (p. 104), of believing that he would outlast the Nazis (p. 106), and asking the question of the memoir'

Calel Perechodnik personally experienced very little anti-Semitism previous to the Nazi invasion of Poland. He and his wife had an opportunity to move to Palestine, but opted to remain in the country of their birth. The young engineer lived a low profile life in his hometown of Otwock, and expected the lives of Jews to only improve as the overall Polish culture turned more secular. Calel respected his Jewish traditions, but perceived himself as primarily a cosmopolitan man who took organized religion with a huge grain of salt. Everything, however, dramatically changed for the worse once the Nazis became the occupying power of Poland. The anti-Semitism of the Roman Catholic majority thereafter ceased being dormant and subtle, and many of these ordinary citizens became vile monsters. Virtually overnight they treated their Jewish friends and neighbors as akin to vermin requiring elimination.The author attempts to save his wife and young daughter by becoming a ghetto policeman. The German Nazis cynically realized that Jewish men could best keep their fellow human beings under control. False hopes were conveyed to the Jews promising that their situation would be secure if only they cooperated. "Jews perished first of all because they didn't realize in time what level German cruelty and barbarism would reach," added the author. The 27 year old Perechodnik is forced to choose the less of evils. Ultimately, his family is not spared and the author is trapped in an environment where treachery, greed, and murder are the norm. Perechodnik's chronicle is not easy reading. It is a moral duty, and not in the least bit pleasurable. The reader will constantly be challenged to dwell upon the horrific choices of Perechodnik. The awkward question of how we would behave under similar circumstances is inevitable.There are a few other books mandating your legitimate interest. Only a few months ago, the Holocaust scholar Jan T. Gross released his superb work "Neighbors" which deals with similar atrocities committed in the Polish town of Jedwabne. Peter Wyden's "Stella" published in 1992 concerns a young Jewish woman who for purely selfish reasons betrayed her friends to the Nazis. Only the very thin veneer of civilization separates us from barbarism. Thus, we are obligated not to ignore the unpleasant truths about the recorded depths of human depravity. Increasing our knowledge betters our chances of curtailing future horrors.

When I read Perechodnik's book years ago, I was profoundly moved by the experiences of the writer in the war years. Having just travelled to Germany and seen some concentration camps, I started reading avidly on the Holocaust and the experiences of survivors and perpetrators. The poignant title of the book was the thing that caught my eye and it remains one of the most startling and powerful accounts of the evil that took place in WWII. It is amazing that this first-hand account survived and I wish it was as highly circulated and read as Anne Frank's diary. Perechodnik's account lets us into the sacrifces one has to make in extreme situations and the guilt he feels throughout the war for abandoning his wife and kid entreats us. A harrowing experience. Let us never forget the humanity in us.

This is not a review, only a personal note. I read the book in its original Polish edition. And having read a number of books on Holocaust and supposed Polish participation in it I just expected some new information on this subject. But this first hand account of what happened to the Otwock Jews and of barbaric behaviuor of Poles from Otwock cannot be more persuasive on the existence of common guilt of the Polish nation for not fighting Holocaust and what's more for taking part in it. Let's not jugde the caught by the horrible times "policeman" His writing stops beating of your heart. After one long evening of reading I went to sleep and had the worst nightmare of my life: I was put into a transport to Treblinka

This is one of the most important books ever published on The Holocaust. It is the Anne Frank of the Polish Jewish Experience. You have to keep reminding yourself that this was written in 1943 as you read it. It is the most compelling and unforgiving personal account written by a Holocaust nonsurvivor.