All We Have Is Now

Taylor is an exceedingly fine writer..one that will give you pause when taking up your next books! Fine writers are few!

This engrossing and satisfying novel is a minor masterpiece. I expected it to be unbearably sad, yet in the end, it was also unexpectedly uplifting. Like all really masterly novels, one is left with an understanding of the complexity of life, of the different shades of good and evil, and with regret that things should be as they are, that we should all inevitably endure suffering and loss, and yet somehow survive. The narrator, Ian, is an actor. He's closed himself off after his lover died from AIDS. He deflects advances, and ends relationships as soon as he feels his heart getting involved. Then he meets Jimmy, a young actor, young enough to be his son. And Jimmy pursues him. And wins him. Not many months later, Jimmy is killed in a hate crime, back in his home town. Ian goes there for the funeral and the trial of Jimmy's murderers. He is befriended by Jimmy's grandmother, who reveals her own secret -- which isn't what you'd think, nor one a lesser writer might have chosen. And he learns about himself, too, about courage and hatred and the need for revenge -- and forgiveness. The story is nicely paced, the courtroom scenes not too long, the development of their love beutifully done, and perfectly contrasted with the depressing horrors of the trial and Jimmy's murderers' lives. And the unexpected twist at the end is heartrending -- and exactly the right point to end the book. This is a book which will remain in your mind long after you have finished it. It's marvellous, filled with humanity and an understanding of and insight into the human condition. Sumptuous. Read it.

This novel begins with a moving prologue in which Ian describes the death of his lover, Trevor, Ian's life partner who has died of AIDS. The devastating impact of Trevor's death leaves middle-aged Ian empty, no longer willing to love another, and totally devoted to his career as a repertory actor. Will he ever be able to love again? Well, several years pass, and Ian finds himself drawn to a beautiful young actor from Texas, named Jimmy, who's playing Ariel in the company's production of "The Tempest". Jimmy falls for Ian as well, and slowly works his way inside the walls of Ian's heart. But on a visit home to Texas, tragedy strikes, as Jimmy is the victim of a hate crime. Ian once again finds himself the survivor after Jimmy's death. Will he be able to rebuild his life again? Or will this be too much for him to overcome? Ian flies to Texas for the funeral and the second part of the novel begins revolving around the trial of Jimmy's killers. Will justice be served? And will Ian be able to show forgiveness? I think the strength of the novel is placed on the second part of the book. The relationship Ian develops with Jimmy's grandmother is beautifully told, and the strength, love and friendship they discover in each other is truly heartwarming. Taylor's taken on two hot topics of the last twenty years in gay politics, AIDS and hate crimes, and has done a remarkable job with them. Yes, it's a take on the Matthew Shepard story, and no one is denying that, and this story could never compare to the tragedy of Matthew's death. However, the more these tragic hate crime stories are told, in whatever form, credit should be given to whoever gets the message across of how wrong and hateful these senseless attacks are. This is a well-written story about love, loss, and the desire of the human spirit to survive. Joe Hanssen

All We Have Is Now is Robert Taylor's latest novel about a lonely actor who finds love for the second time in his life but loses his lover after he is brutally murdered in a hate crime. ... The murder sets off a complicated tapestry of events in the small Texas town where Jimmy grew up. A media circus trial ensues, discrimination and gay bias unravels, and Jimmy's parents finally come to terms with their son's homosexuality with the help of Jimmy's grandmother, Livie and Ian.  The book has a reflective feel to the Matthew Sheppard case and even mentions it during the trial but I don't think Taylor was trying to motivate his readers in that direction. Taylor brings many different messages to the table with his book. He explores the relationship between a younger gay man and an older gay man, he works a psychological profile on how to deal with a lover's death from AIDS and a hate crime, and he tries to deal with the emotions of a lover's parents whom are not acceptable to the gay lifestyle.  Taylor succeeds in making this novel a tearjerker. There is a lot of sadness through out and you can get into each one of the characters streams of consciousness but I think Taylor sensationalized Jimmy's murder too much and gave it an overblown look....

a wonderful story. Mr. Taylor writes with care. I think it is both a gay novel and a novel that shows taylor's ability to show complexity with easy.enjoyed the court room the best.