Aging Parents, Aging Children: How to Stay Sane and Survive

Reviewed by Richard R. Blake for Reader Views (10/07) Drs. Miriam K. Aronoson and Marcella Bakur Weiner have written "Aging Parents, Aging Children" for the average person faced with a care-giving challenge. The book is filled with practical examples and dramatic scenarios to help the reader identify with others who have, or are experiencing, similar problems or challenges. Early chapters include helpful information pointing out diversity among families, differences in philosophy, beliefs, personality traits, and family dynamics. These all play a part in the approach chosen to provide the best possible care. As changes in physical health, emotional stability, or mental faculties, take their toll, it is important to begin an assessment process. This will help the family or caregiver size up the current condition through diagnosis, prognosis, treatment and aftercare needs. Excellent charts and tables provide an overview and checklist for this assessment and setting up a plan of care. Once this has been done immediate concerns, logistics, legal issues, and finances all come into play. I especially appreciated the chapter dedicated to discussing dementia and Alzheimer's disease and the suggestions for placement versus home care. Symptoms, causes, and treatments are all considered in this informational and helpful presentation. A concern often overlooked is the care and welfare of the caregiver. This chapter is of particular importance to everyone reading the book. Self-care is an important part of the process of renewal, nurture, and balance. The final chapter titled "Demystifying the Maze" is a helpful glossary of important elder care language. Internationally acclaimed as experts in the area of elder care, Aronson and Weiner, collaborate to bring the reader insight, confidence, compassion and hope in caring for their loved one. The authors assist the reader faced with navigating the maze of systems and services, the challenge of relationships, resource limitations, and expectations of family and the importance of self help. Thorough in presentation, written in an easy-to-understand style, "Aging Parents, Aging Children" is a practical prescription for an escalating pandemic of eldercare challenges.

This is a wonderful "hands-on" text that delineates and clarifies the experiences of both the aging parents and family members, particularly the care-givers. It is clear and sensitively-written and every aspect from diagnosis to planning and placement is comprehensively presented with excellent examples demonstrating "the tightrope that familes and providers often have to walk." Focus on the caregivers and their need to maintain a balanced life adds a critically-important dimension often overlooked in eldercare books. A must read for everyone with aging parents.

I found this book invaluable and refreshing; it deals with an issue that is inevitable and progressive in a clear, comprehensive fashion. This books spells out exactly what goes on in all of us--how to live with and understand our own aging. It's a good choice for a complex issue--everyone should have a copy.

As a care giver, I found this book extremely useful in dealing with realities of being a caretaker. It is well written and has many helpful examples of how to handle life challenges.

As someone who has worked with the aged extensively, and familiar with the literature on it, I find this book absolutely outstanding. Its handling of family turmoil, love and all that goes on for the older adult and their children, the decisions of when to place someone in a facility, the perceptions and misperceptions of dementia are done with clarity and obvious longterm experience of the authors. A gem, this book is most highly recommended.