A Paper Life

Tatum seems guarded with her words but says just enough to let us into her personal struggles with life in the O'neal family especially with her father. Could not help but feel anything but sorry for her mother. Just enough information in this book to make it a page turner and I look forward to reading her next book to see how her journey continues.

This is one of the liveliest star autobiographies I have read since the late John Phillips' "Papa John." Phew, who knew that the spunky little girl who became the youngest Oscar winner ever was living a childhood from Hell, saddled with a hopelessly, helplessly alcoholic mother and a father, the actor Ryan O'Neal, who emerges here as one of the most abusive parents in Hollywood, a monster right up there with Joan Crawford and Bing Crosby. If it wasn't bad enough that she had a selfish, self-absorbed, verbally and physically abusive father with a serious anger management problem, then, as Freud could have foretold, she chose the same kind of selfish, self-absorbed hothead to marry -- John McEnroe. What a loser this guy is, former "number one tennis player in the world" or not! Also portrayed in a bad light is Farrah Fawcett, who enabled Ryan O'Neal in their relationship for many years and apparently failed to intervene when he would rage and beat up his children in front of her. She must have a terribly low self-esteem also to have tolerated this abusive goon for so long! Now I hear that Farrah is about to have a reality TV series on a cable channel, the highlight of which is scheduled to be her marriage to Ryan! I hope readers of this book will have the decency to give this series and these two pathetic excuses for human beings a wide, wide berth, just as viewers turned away in droves from McEnroe's recent talk show. Bleahhh... It's time we demand some accountability for their actions from our celebrities, as well as our lying politicians and steroid-abusing athletes. At any rate, it's a wonder that Tatum survived her upbringing, apparently due to the positive influence of a twelve-step program. If her unfortunate brother Griffin and half-brother Redmond survive to tell their tales, those books will undoubtedly make for compelling reads as well. Once again this book proves that all that glisters is far from gold, and that the fair faces of Hollywood can hide some hideous demons inside.

I just read a review just posted and it was brilliant unfortunately Lillian Fields you spelled O'Neal wrong but it didn't matter the message was received. I, too, was around the O'Neal family when Tatum and Griffin were growing up. Tatum told just enough in this book, she did not "bare all" as they say. She couldn't have safely not with Ryan still around. We know that. I am so sorry that Griffin and Tatum had to suffer such ordeals throughout their childhood but if it's true what they say that we pick our parents - somehow - we have to learn to refocus on what is good. We learn to leave the pain behind us, as Tatum clearly has and move forward. This chapter of Tatum's life is now clearly behind her. As far as her father, Ryan's obnoxious comments in People and Us Magazines about Tatum's book - I think he sounds so pompous, so angry and is so obviously lying that the public can see right through him. He is actually worse than Tatum wrote him to be and that is most likely because he is her father and she will always be his daughter no matter how badly he abused her. I will never be able to wash away my own firsthand memories of his responses to her success as an actress. Sometimes it is hard to forgive and forget. I think the best we can do sometimes is just hope to forget.

I read this with my mouth hanging open. I mean, I knew Ryan O'Neal was a terrible father, but I had no idea just how terrible. My grandmother was an entertainment journalist and a close friend of Tatum O'Neal's mother, Joanna Moore. I played with Tatum and Griffin when we were all children -- pre-"Paper Moon"- and I remember Tatum as a vibrant, funny, happy child. But this was before Ryan O'Neal cheated on Joanna Moore, dumped her, and eventually succedded in having her locked up in a mental health facility for a period of time. He also actively conspired to prevent her from having ANY contact with her own children, something he was able to accomplish by virtue of his (then) considerable power in Hollywood. I remember listening to Joanna Moore sobbing on my grandmother's couch as my grandmother promised to try to reason with Ryan and get him to allow her to see her children. She also had to help Joanna get to talk to her kids on their birthdays by placing calls to boarding schools on her behalf since Ryan O'Neal had forbidden school authorities to allow Joanna to talk to the kids. How horrible and ironic that all these years later, John McEnroe decided to punish Tatum O'Neal for her own (admitted) drug problems by attempting to remove her from her kids' lives altogether. And once again, as the man with the bigger career and bigger bank account, he was able to do the same thing that Ryan O'Neal did to Joanna Moore. This book is fast paced, cleanly written and brutally honest. Of course many people won't want to believe it or will call Tatum O'Neal a liar, but that's what happens to many, if not most, survivors of childhood abuse of all kinds. Best of luck to Tatum and her children from my family. Katie Allison Granju Knoxville, TN

Tatum is a brave honest woman who lived to tell the experiences that happen from the effect of seriously neglectful parents incapable of caring for her and her brothers. She need not feel ashamed of how the adults in her life during her childhood failed her. Adults in her life let her down when she was a child and she has no blame to bare in their failure. They are to blame she was not attended to in a loving kind manner and did not meet her growing emotional needs and just enjoy her wonderfulness of being a growing little girl. She need not feel ashamed she is finally dealing with the legacy of her dysfunctional upbringing. The shame belongs with her father for never trying to make himself a better father for his kids so he could care for his children. Ryan it's never too late to say your sorry!! Loving someone means you NEED to say you are sorry. Tatum is now dealing with her own children the way no one ever cared for her (I hope this is healing for her) she seems like a kind, sweet, loving, thoughtful attentive mother finally working on stopping the cycle of her unfortunate family legacy. She deserves admiration for telling her truth and for living through her heart-breaking childhood and addiciton.